No... You Sketch It

Fifth grade Christmas recital.  Everyone was required to sing on stage.  We were in height order, which I loved because to my immediate right is the cutest girl in the entire class, Karen.  I'm wasn't too excited to be singing, but I'm went with it because Karen was totally into it and exhibiting signs of being into me.

What she didn't know was, for the past couple of weeks,  I had been experiencing some... um... changes.  Boy to man changes.  Awkward.

Everything was going great until we got to one part of the chorus that I chose to sing with some gusto and thanks to my impending manhood, I cracked a few uneven notes.  After the song was done, Steven, the short guy directly in front of me, decided to turn around and rather publicly stated "You sound like a frog."  Well... this got him quite a few laughs, Karen's interest in me deflated and I was scarred for life.  If we ever play "Rock Band" together, please don't ask me to take the microphone, I'll pick up the sticks and play the drums in the background, thank you very much.

But singing isn't the worst of my abilities, the one thing I absolutely can't do is draw.  Even my stick figures are hard to make out.   It is my true weak point.

While involved in one of my favorite activities, ripping new packs of cards,  I received a card, or should I say "special note" from Topps asking me the question: "Think you have what it takes to be a Topps sketch card artist?  Well Topps... the answer is... no... no I do not.  So I'll gladly pass.

The only problem is in 40 packs of Series 2, I've received 4 sketch cards.  With the odds of 1 sketch card in every 24 packs, I should have one, maybe two, but four sketch cards?   Is Steven working for Topps?

Whenever I look at the card, I think everyone at Topps is laughing at me, just waiting for me to send it back so they can post it on their wall of shame.  Am I doomed to be teased, grade school style,  for the rest of my life?

So, Topps, in response to your request that "I Sketch It" I say, "No... You Sketch It."  That's why I pay you and not the other way around.  Don't send me anymore of those blank white cards, I don't want them, and if you don't stop bullying me, I'm going to tell my Mommy.